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Finally, Dean Dody takes the podium. At last! Beaming, his round face bobs up and down in anticipation. He looks to the left, then the right, then straight ahead as if to assure himself unnecessarily that he has the faculty’s complete attention. “Great gifts that change the future of an institution stem from a boundless selflessness,” the Dean begins. “At best, those of us who are recipients of this beneficence can stand back in awe and gratitude. Today, through this substantial endowment in recognition of the upcoming Carsonville Bicentennial, I am honored to officially announce that,” he pauses for a silent drum roll, “a Chair, to be known as the Sam Bailey Jr. Scholar in Clinical Law, will not only honor our law school but will support the critical missions of independent scholarship and teaching excellence.” The Dean continues: “The terms of this generous gift from Sam Bailey Jr. are few. The recipient, who will receive tenure, must have been born in the great State of Alabama, and he or she must be an authority in the field of Clinical Law. We foresee with this endowment that our Clinic – already nationally recognized in just the two short years since its establishment – will become the leader in this burgeoning field. Sam’s own law school Clinic experience up north at …. what’s the name of that place again?” The Dean opens his palms, shrugs and smiles, attempting to make a joke of the insecurity we “second tier” law schools wear like an albatross. The faculty titters with nervous laughter. Sam Bailey attended Yale Law School, number one for the umpteenth year in the all important U.S. News and World Report’s yearly law school ranking. Sam has spent a small fortune on ASU, trying his best to push us us into the top fifty, the much desired “first tier.” Not only did he endow the Clinical Chair, but Sam contributed a huge chunk of the money for the law school building itself as well as the funds used to hire me and to start my Clinic two years ago. “The Trustees and I, with the able assistance of the Rank and Tenure Committee, have chosen the recipient for the Chair and I am proud to introduce the new Bailey Professor of Clinical Law,” the Dean continues. “Please congratulate and welcome our new Bailey Chair in Clinical Law.” The Dean’s voice rises forcefully as he readies the crowd for the big announcement. I lean forward slightly, inhale, and try to put on a grateful but humble face as I stand up.
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